September 23, 2009
The best funny life quotes
Sometimes let it get you down and it feels very difficult to get back up again. When you need a little lift you can read some of these quotes about life.
“Doing nothing is very hard to do…you never know when you’re finished. ” Leslie Nielsen
“You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you’re not ‘professional’ any more. ” Jeff Foxworthy
“Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down. ” Jimmy Durante
“This guy says, ‘I’m perfect for you, because I’m a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.’ I said, ‘Oh, a gay trucker?’ ” Judy Tenuta
“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. ” Robin Williams
“I’ve dated men my age, younger than me and older. The only difference is the young ones are quicker at taking out the garbage. ” Lara Flynn Boyle
Have a look through some of the best quotes about life.
“I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.” George Burns
“Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs.” Robin Williams
“The fact that no one understands you doesn’t make you an artist. ” Anonymous
“I love deadlines. I especially love the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ” Douglas Adams
How about these quotes about life.
“Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box” Italian proverb
“As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was it nothing more than a bunch of honking and yelling? Sometimes it seemed that way.” Jack Handey
“When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, “Has the bus come yet?”. If the bus came would I be standing here?” Billy Connolly
“John Goodman isn’t fat. He’s in a category beyond fat. What does one call it? Whalelike ” Sam Kinison
“When I’m really hot, I can walk into a room and if a man doesn’t look at me, he’s probably gay. ” Kathleen Turner
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